Let the Festivities begin....

Hey All!

Firstly, Happy Dusshera/ Vijayadashami to all of you!

Image courtesy geet_kunal

The victory of Lord Rama over Ravana; Victory of Goddess Durga over Mahishasura.

I just got to know what all of the10 heads of Ravana signify:
(1) Kama vasana (Lust),
(2) Krodha (Anger),
(3) Moha (Delusion),
(4) Lobha (Greed),
(5) Mada (Over Pride),
(6) Matsara (Jealousy),
(7) Manas (Mind),
(8) Buddhi (Intellect),
(9) Chitta (will) and
(10) Ahankara (Ego).
Talk about split-personalities! What will I do without you Wiki? :D

So Time to Celebrate! Stuff yourselves with all the fafda and jalebi and cham-cham and rosogulla and sandesh and... and...and......
*mouth waters* (OK. Gkam. Focus now. No drool on the keyboard. Focus!)
*ahem*....you can lay your hands on...


So you see, THIS is my favorite time of the year... So many festivals! So much fun. So much food! Yummy!....I mean....Yipppppppeeeeeeeeeeeee!


Not to mention the shopping sales, parties, weddings, buffet.....(Oh STOP it Already!!)...and brand-new-designer-outfits-no-longer-fit....

Oh boy, I can't wait for Diwali.!!! :) :) :)
Halloween! (OK, I don't celebrate it, but I like the idea....Trick or Treat anyone?)
And Christmas and then New Year!!


Oh, the year just ended. Yikes.*Gulp*

I gotta lie down. :|

Erm, Enjoy!! :)




P.S. I got issues with "Time Flying" and "Not Studying". Yeah, I'm the love child of Procrastination and Indolence!

P.P.S. I would have posted this earlier yesterday had my internet connection not thrown a fit. Getting too cranky after 18 hours.. Ho-Hum!

Top 20 ways to kill boredom while Shopping

My family and I rarely visit the friendly neighbourhood Supermarket. How much ever the adverts try, they don't entice us into shopping for their products with "Rock bottom prices" or "earth shattering discounts".
Whenever we do its just the habitual, casual first-day-of-the-month-I've-got-my-paycheck-will-"splurge"-Look!-new-offers type of shopping. It isn't walk in the park actually, when we have to go when the rush hour is at its annoying best.
Personally, I ain't a compulsive or impulsive shopper; I like to shop at my leisure albeit sticking to the list. My family, on the other hand, insists on shopping according to the "routine".


The "routine" is when the four of us are out to shop, it isn't just shopping anymore, but rather turns into more of a military operation. My mom and I would be (wo-)manning the condiments and food-grain aisles and swiftly grab each item as if the Salvation Army needed it for their next mission to Rwanda. My brother and my dad station themselves with a cart each, eyeballing queued up customers for the next empty (or least crowded) spot at the cashier. We keep ourselves updated and communicated on our status with respect to the completion of our target list cum dossier (read:half-a-shopping list) via satellite communication (read:pointing at product and nodding vigorously or yelling at top of our lungs).

That's us. But I feel shopping becomes an "enriching" experience when you have some fun at it, without getting bored. Having said that, I present to you,

The Top 20 Ways to Kill Boredom while Shopping

20. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals.

19. Jump into a shopping cart and try to race your way up to the exit screaming "I'm freeeeeeeeeeeee"

18. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the restrooms.

17. Challenge other customers to a duel as Darth-Vader with tubes of gift wrap.

16. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I believe we have a code 3 in housewares" and see what happens.

15. Convince you've lost your friend and insist that the announcer at the lost and found department announces:  "Thoswana P Badlee, please come to the Lost and Found, immediately!"


14. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.


13. When someone asks if they can help you, you begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people ever leave me alone?"


12. Block a lane with stray shopping carts leading to the Cashier and speak like a sage:
“Say the Magic Word. Only then shall you pass”

11. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

10. Take up an entire aisle in the Toys department by setting up a full scale battlefield with Pokemon and the Barbies.

9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

8. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible".

7. Switch signs on the Men's and Women's bathrooms.

6. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!"

5. In the Auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.


4. Take 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

3. Dart back and forth from the Cafeteria to the Restroom making retching noises. When have caught somebody's attention say: "It must be the (insert-name-of-food-they-are-eating)"

2. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through say "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

and the numero uno:

1. Go into the Changing Room and yell real loud...."Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"




P.S.: Sniped some points from an e-mail. For more click here

P.P.S. The blog and Gkam neither sponsors or advises its readers to implement/suggest/ameliorate on the above "enriching" activities nor takes the blame/guilt on the lawsuit filed against you by your friendly neighborhood supermarket.
In short: At your own risk... :P

Sweet Agony

She looked at the ceiling and closed her eyes. It was the only comfort she sought.
She couldn’t take it anymore.

She grabbed the bedspread harder and tugged it. She had to stop it, but how?


She couldn’t. Not yet. It wasn’t time.
She would know when it was time.


But the pain…the agonizing pain...


She then saw his handsome sweaty face. He held her hand.
She let him.


He leaned to kiss her.
She turned her face away.


She didn’t know what to think.
Pain tortured her body. But his face brought back memories.
Sweet memories; didn’t alleviate her from suffering.

She had to be strong. No matter what.

He had given her this pain. Of the sweet agony with him that made her suffer.
Why now? She wondered.

He held her hand tighter.

Sweat beads shone over her forehead glistening in the light.

She bit her lip and turned to face him again. He was smiling. The same smile that made her fall in love with him all again.

Her body contorted with every ache. Numbness set in.

She had enough. It was time.

She let go with all the force she could muster. Her lip bled.

And then it was all over.




A sound she was longing for filled the room. It was melodious as ever. She could feel her body again.

“Here you go Mrs. Smith, It’s a boy!” said the doctor.

She held her baby in her arms and cried. She was a mother now. And nothing- not even the excruciating pain- mattered now. It was all worth it.

She looked lovingly at her bundle of joy. Her own blood, flesh and bone. Their eyes met.


He smiled. Just like his father did.





(PS: My first time in such a mode of writing. Need honest advice/suggestions/brickbats/rotten andaa-tamatar in comments section please :D )

India: not so FAQ

With the schools and colleges closed and most paranoid Mumbaikars confined to their influenzaless homes- unless they brave outdoors only with a green phantom mask-I was bored and browsing through my e-mails when I came across this hilarious one I received ages ago. I ROFLed all over again! :D

The answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have an excellent sense of humour.


Q: Does it ever get windy in India? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Delhi to Goa- can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand kms, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in India? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in India? Can you send me a list of them in Delhi, Chennai, Calcutta and Bangalore? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in India? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. In-di-a is that big triangle in the middle of the Pacific & Indian Ocean which does not.. oh forget it. ...... Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Goa. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in India? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into India? ( UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Indiana Pacers matches schedule? (France)
A: Indiana is a state in the Unites States of...oh forget it. Sure, the Indiana Pacers matches are played every Tuesday night in Goa, straight after the hippo races.

Q: Can I wear high heels in India? ( UK )
A: You're a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Bangalore, and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in India who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Indian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: Do you have perfume in India? ( France)
A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in India? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in India? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

Q: Can I see Taj Mahal anytime? (Italy)
A: As long as you are not blind, you can see it anytime.

Q: Do you have Toilet paper? (USA)
A: No, we use sand paper. (we have different grades)


Happy Independence Weekend y'all!


(PS: Trying really REALLY hard to get outta "writer's block")
(PPS: Thanks to Rach for the e-mail :) )

You know you are in Engineering....

My four years at engineering took alot of hard work(puh-leez!), dedication(yeah! right!! *rolls eyes*) and commitment (AHAHAHA!).
So here goes the routine.-> Enjoy!

SUBMISSIONS/EXAMS/VIVAS/PROJECTS

1. The local xerox-wallah and Google search engine become your life savers at the last moment study routine
2. When you become a call centre executive on the eve of a major exam, answering to hassled and traumatized peers
3. When you turn into a CIA agent hunting for every note(s) visible and Xerox them all, only to end up with 5 sets of the same notes!
4. Where phrases like “dimag ka short ho gaya yaar!”, “jherroxx kar lena”, “abbey, “proxy maara kya?”, “chalta hai na”, “kuch nahi pada yaaaaarrrrr”, “array, JHOL ho gaya yaar!” are the lingo generated especially during the Preparatory leave (PL)
5. When you confess on your “haaalat” of too-much-portion-too-little-time to your confidante when you’ve already revised the syllabus ;)
6. When you work more on your final semester project than any other assignment in your 4 years of engineering

TRUSTED NUTRITIONIST:

7. Where your local SST hangout is the anna’s canteen or tapri outside college
8. Where cries of “baaatermelaaaaannnnnnnn jooooooozzzz” “vhegg cheeeeeeeejjjjjjjj tosttt” are alluring to your ears and fulfill your daily dietary requirements
9. When opening of 'dabba' at 8.05 am is having breakfast and is natural even when the first lecture/practical of the day is going on amidst professors.

ADVANCE BOOKING:

10. Where your CR is the most dependable person; who can even convince your professor to cancel/ postpone his/her lecture for weeks to come

LABORATORY MANIPULATORY

11. When night-outs in college labs are not just….er…. for completing project work ;)
12. When you realize the importance of hidden files and folders in Windows and root directory in Linux :D
13.When you rather stay up all night discussing “tactics” for the Java practical than studying for it
14.When you complete your journals whenever and wherever feasible as if your life depends on it
15. When you have backup of backup of backup plan(s) even when SOME moron gets a CD written of answers during final exam dry lab practicals
16. When the Alt+F4 combination saves you from getting your ass whipped when playing Slayers and Mob Wars on FB :P
17. When you know the college network administrator’s password better than you know your own e-mail’s
18. When you value MS Word's auto-save feature when completing an assignment /project due next day and power-cuts have no mercy

DANCE OF ATTENDANCE

19. Where even the students who have left the college clear the attendance cut-off percentage even before you do
20. When you spend more hours on traveling to college than on attending lectures
21. When you attend college ONLY to either pay fees/ attendance defaulter’s fine or get notes or claim your hall ticket

PUNCTURING PUNCTUALITY

22. When coming to college at 8.30am for an 8.00am lecture is “thoda late” but 8.35am is “kitna late yaaaaarrrrr!!!”

23. When you frantically chat up a “new admission” in the corridor, only to realize that they’ve been in your class for the past four semesters :O

GTalk + Facebook

24. When you are “busy” on GTalk/Facebook, doing nothing
25. When you are “Not at my desk” on GTalk, you are playing games on facebook
26. Your idea of 'multi-tasking' is chatting simultaneously in multiple GTalk/Facebook chat windows

LIBRARY? (What’s THAT?)

27. When you hunt for e-books and print them rather than stepping inside the library to issue the same for free
28. When “Research” to you is limited to the first 10 hits of Google search to your query
29. When you consider the Handwritten notes of professors as the Bible while research papers are sedatives in paper form.
30. The only time you step inside the library is to get Xeroxes from the xerox-wallah
31. Even if you manage to get further than the Xerox-wallah inside the depths of the library, (G-E-E-K!)you meet the librarian who acts no less than a prison guard guarding the pile of books
32. To ask the librarian to lend u a reference copy (OK, my life depends on that book now!) is equivalent to engaging in mortal combat with her, and you DEFINITELY get KO-ed!





I would like to dedicate this post ESPECIALLY to my wonderful BBI batch of 2009 pals:
Especially,
•Amu (woman, you’ve been there through my mood swings, frantic notes collection, et. Al. Thank you for being there for me all these four years!)
•My project gang… the four of us, who ALWAYS stuck as a team: Vidzy, Kanni and Monts.
•Vicco (Just chatting away at late nights; anything under the sun and transmitting loads of *ahem* information :P)
•Shaily, my sweet friend and support who’s always been a dear friend throughout the 4 years.
Last but never the least,
•Raniji who was the life saver of our class, on whom each and every BBI-ite depended on him for something or the other, and never failing on patience. Cheers man! And you \m/

Also like to give a call out to Dhruti, Sangya, Mahak, Shiny, Anindita, Saumya, Sindhu, Sneha, Rucha, Anish, Shibboo, Nutty, Anks, Manni, Shruti, Sunil who've helped me in one way or the other.

Glad i am done with engineering!
Peace out! :D

Fantastic Four

Curdrice aka KarSub has tagged moi.
Without further adieu, I shall torture entertain thee!

Four places that I have lived in

Mumbai, Navi Mumbai (Its different from the former, Mind Ittt!), Indore, Bangalore

Four TV Shows I love to watch

House M.D. :...."Theme Music.".. from Teardrop by Massive Attack
The Little Lulu Show: "...always in and outta trouble, but mostly always in!..."
F.R.I.E.N.D.S :"....i'll be there for you oooooooooo...."
How I Met Your Mother: "..dhan dhan dhan...pa papa pa pa pa..."

Four places I have been on vacation

Goa: Is like my second home
Singapore: Although been there once, would love to visit again
Japan: Moshi moshi! Hajimemashite. Doozo yoroshiku.
My couch: I [heart] my couch, sweet slumber!

Four favorite food items

Missal pav: Give it to me anytime of the day, I'll ravish it!
Coriander Chutney Sandwich: Made by my mum ONLY!
Phanna Dalithoy(Tadka Dal): All u konkanis out there will get what I mean.... :D
Chicken Biryani: Lucky's Bandra wallah :P

(I'm salivating already....)

Four Websites I visit daily

Uno, Dos, Tres, Cuatro

Four places I’d rather be

Harvard University, USA
Fine dining with Brad Pitt (after unceremoniously kicking Angelina Jolie out), George Clooney and Richard Gere
Inside Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory
In a daily comic

Four things I hope to do before I die

Fly a helicopter over the Australian coast
Ride a Double-Decker bus
Eat ice cream at the Antarctic
Meet a person who's name starts with a !

Four novels I wish I was reading for the first time

Calvin and Hobbes Comics
Rage of Angels
Harry Potter series
Yes Minister

Four movies I can watch over and over again

Liar Liar: Jim-Carey-is-the-BEST!
Home Alone 1: Love it!
Beauty & The Beast: Disney's finest...
An Officer and A Gentleman: utterly romantic

Four people I want to tag

(cracking knuckles)


And behind Door number One
Door number Two
Door number Three
Door number Four




(mirthful laughter) :D

Rhythm Divine

When the skies appear sullen as if after a white-wash, the sun peeps through the clouds no more, the cool icy breeze wavering the leaves on trees, pitter-patter of the raindrops against the windows...What can get better than this atmosphere, when the clouds pour down without inhibition albeit intimidating Nature to take on its course.

All one can do in this wonderful serene weather is to sit back and enjoy nature's spectacle; every cycle begins with the blessing of monsoon as mother earth quenches her thirst for many a months in the seasonal cycle.

The onset of the monsoon brings one joy-one becomes a kid again-and undiluted calmness. I reminisce, the flowing of paper boats across the overflowing water stream, wearing gumboots and flopping about in my raincoat, without a care in the world dancing away to the divine rhythm of the rain. (And also of how being scolded for turning into a muddy mess and have earthworms crawling all over the floors of my home :P)

Of corn cobs being roasted merrily while tea simmers away in an old pot. Of sitting beside a loved one chatting away interrupted only to sip hot tea and eat hot onion fritters. When one doesn't mind when umbrella is forgotten "by mistake" and get drenched to the toe on such a whim.

Such wonderful times, mesmerizing...

Reminds me a wonderful song by B. J. Thomas:

"..The blues they send to meet me won't defeat me
It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me..
..Raindrops keep fallin' on my head.."

Enjoy the monsoons folks! :)



Statutory Warning: This post may dampen/ unable to rekindle spirits of those afflicted with leaky-nose syndrome (aka common cold).

image courtesy: mlissa2121 from photobucket.