Thursday, December 31, 2009

And the award goes to....

 
Thank You Blogadda!


As 2009 comes to an end and the winter of ever sunny Mumbai kicks in, I reflect back into this year on all its events. Although I did not receive any awards in the real sense or on my blog, so I thought 'why not create my own set of awards'. (Its here you say: Aahhh! ) I, Gkam, now present to you:


Gkam's Award Ceremony 2009


Nominations-Shominations! These Winners are above and beyond that....

And the winners are: 

*Drumroll please*


Wordsworth Award: Shashi Tharoor, Deputy Minister for External Affairs

Big Boss Award: S. M. Krishna, Minister for External Affairs

Humble (American) Pie Award: Peace Nobel Winner U. S. President Barack Obama

SEXagenarian of the Year Award: Former Andhra Governer N. D. Tiwari

Quickfire Response Award: Liberhan Report on Babri Masjib Demolition. (Yeah, the "leaked" report is 126MB)

Bharatiya Naari Award: Rakhi Sawant

Little Bo- BEEP Award : Kamal Rashid Khan fondly(!) known as KRK

Tom and Jerry Award : IIM and Prometric

Miss Congeniality: Serena Williams

The Dark Horse Award : Vindu Dara Singh on winning Big Boss 3 and coincidentally also wins Mirror Breaking Material Award!

Best Rendezvous point: Copenhagen, Denmark

Most popularly used four letter word: H1N1

Award for the Most Considerate: Kanye West American Rapper

Aquasure Award: Chandrayaan, India's maiden Moon mission

Sweet 17 Award: Sachin Tendulkar (on completing 17000 runs in ODIs  in 20 years)

Best Employer of the Year Award: Air India

Atithi Devo Bhavaha Award(Guest is God): Australia

Bankrupt Award: Ramalinga Raju

Two to Tango Award: A. R. Rahman on winning both Oscars and Grammy

United we Stand Award: Now, this award will be (un-)evenly divided amongst Telangana, Harit Pradesh, Gorkhaland.

Alive and Kicking Award: BJP; This award will be received by L. K. Advani

'Baby one more time' Award: UPA; isssssskoooo receive karrrrengiiiii Mrs. Sonia Gandhi

Maid-en over Award: Shiney Ahuja

Husband of the Year: Tiger Woods

Golfer of the Year/ Golden Glove: Elin Nordegren


Last but never the least....


Best Actress of the Year: Rohit Verma in Big Boss 3

Best Actor: Terrorist Ajmal Kasab



Now, now, give the winners a big round of applause!

This is my last post for 2009. I wish all my readers a very very Happy New Year 2010!
May happiness and success be all round the year and May your troubles last as long as your resolutions :P

Signing off.
Optimistically yours,

Gkam :)

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

3 IDIOTS: Dont be an IDIOT!







   Image Copyright: Rajkumar Hirani & V V Chopra

The Aamir Khan starrer was laugh riot indeed. But let me present to you, the REAL life idiots:

Idiot number 1: One who jaywalks


Image Copyright: Cartoonstock
 


Idiot number 2: One who crosses railway tracks (even though knowing that there is a foot-over bridge)


Image Copyright: fineartamerica.com


Idiot number 3: One who drives after getting intoxicated and/or while talking on the mobile phone.



 



My humble request to those falling in the above category:

DONT be an Idiot! Because: Idiots Do Increadibly 'Orrible Things

Happy 2010.

Friday, December 25, 2009

Seasons' Greetings!




Wish you all A Merry Christmas, 
May the Joys of the season 
Fill your heart with goodwill and cheer. 
May the chimes of Christmas glory 
Add up more shine and spread Smiles across the miles, 
To-day & In the New Year.
-Rosie Cash



Image copyright: www. adom.de


Gkam wishes all her readers a very Merry Christmas and a 
Happy New Year!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Target Forty

Hey! I'm baaack...

*crickets chirping*

Hello? Anybody miss me???

*crickets disappear*

Well, even if you didn't know, I've been away from blogging for more than two months, and find it as difficult as ever to put together a post. Although there are many thoughts and ideas swimming in my mind at the moment waiting to be turned into masterpieces (modest aren't I?) and grace this very Blogosphere (*rolling eyes*), but I shall post this "random" of a post anyways.

Happy Holidays in advance to all my blog buddies! My only activities in this nippy winter is that like of a mountain bear in hibernation; it seems I spend way more time sleeping than a Mr. Teddy usually does. And I had my birthday last week. There is nothing "fun" about turning a year older and stepping even closer than before to perhaps start the use of Anti-Age Wrinkle cream, but what made it special is that, somehow the people who I wanted to wish me- even though they were thousands of miles away swearing at the bitter cold of winter and cursing the very existence of the month of December- did.

I saw HIMYM last week where it had Marshall Eriksson (one of the lead characters) reading out his things to do before 30 list. And it made me wonder...

And so off late, I've been pondering (pardon the cliche) about what I would see myself fifteen or so years down the line to have accomplished. And so I decided, making no commitments in cement, to make a To-Do Wish List* before I turn forty.

So, here I go:
1. Author a book
(If Stephanie Meyer can get her bestseller storyline in her sleep, I should have been writing sagas by now)

2. Travel to atleast 5 different countries
(Home country and taking a stopover flight does not count)

3. Create a headline/ Be interviewed on TV
(The good and non-scandalous kind)

4. Be fluent in a Foreign Language
(Accented English does not count)

5. Invent something
(A word or phrase...anything, but something!)

6. TRY to enter into the Guinness book of world records
(then again, TRY)

7. Still run this blog
(..And criticize this post and the warmth of the winter that made me write this in the first place)


If I don't make any of them from this list, feel free to mock. (Be nice)

OK, wow, this merry season is getting to me. I've kept this post as raw and unedited as my thoughts (I know its gonna bite me in the a** later)

*No. No. Not THAT list is private.

Cheerio folks!
Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year 2010 in Advance....

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Speaking of a post

Speaking of a post....
I literally have nothing to blog about. My TV is back after a 3 month hiatus. I can't seem to be reading anything, just watching. Hence "exploring" and "learning" about the current affairs. Maybe that's why I can't seem to think- from the vast expanse of the meninges folds and gray matter of my brain-of one decent blog post.

Speaking of decent....
I cannot believe that of all people Rakhi Savant was allowed to take care of a toddler! I pity the toddler who will soon grow up and wonder out loud "Oh Jhejus! Which of these outfits would show more cleavage?!!". She even dressed the boy like a girl, and with MAKEUP while his biological mother was tearing her hair apart. Why couldn't NDTV Imagine just throw the infant to ravenous hyenas? Hyenas would be less brutal. And more eye pleasing!! Wolves even! Mowgli turned out fine.

Jungle Book's beloved character: Mowgli
Speaking of Mowgli....
I don't seem to understand the unnecessary fuss and brouhaha over Bollywood actresses wearing bikinis onscreen. They do it all the time in beauty pageants, fashion shows, casting couches and the like. Hollywood actresses don't make such a fuss to be on Playboy! Grow up! If you have it, flaunt it. Big Deal! (I can sense fervent nods from the Indian male population)


Speaking of Big....
Big Boss season 3 is out. There is a season 3? Arre baba, does ANYONE care?

Speaking of Baba...
Baba Ramdev has been "gifted" a Scottish island. Newspapers say "Baba Ramdev will also teach the people of Scotland how to perform 'Yoga' to make your life better." Yoga is good. Somehow, I just can't imagine the Scotts in their quilts, armed with a pint performing the Halasana. I remember my yoga class back in school. Early morning at 6am, doing yoga....nothing like the Shavasana. Zzzzzz.



  Above : Halasana (Hala= Plough), Below: Shavasana (Shava=corpse) No, the kitty is alive.

Speaking of  Zzzzz.....

Actor Shiney Ahuja is out of jail after being convicted for allegedly raping his maid. Which movie was he in? Did anyone REALLY miss him? Well... apart from his wife. Media, media! Unnecessary attention, I tell you!

Speaking of unnecessary....
President Barrack Obama was honored with the Nobel for Peace. Hmm. Lets see.
Elected this year.
9 months into his presidency.
Did not decline by stating that 'there is a lot that he needs to achieve before he feels worthy of it'
Why, then that's completely justified! Hey, why don't we give Shashi Tharoor one for Literature? OK I better shut up before Mr. Tharoor hurls abuses at me in his tweets.....


Speaking of  tweet...
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaave you met Neil Patrick Harris (Barney Stinson of How I met your Mother fame) on Twitter? Its nice to find celebs on twitter; but I wish there were more politicians than celebs.

Laloo himself with his trademark Kulhad(r).

Imagine if Laloo Prasad Yadav was on twitter. He'd allow you to subscribe to his updates only if you'd buy a yearly supply of kulhad(r)s (earthen pot). Anyhow, I tweeted Barney and he didn't reply back. Bet he realized he's got competition at Awesomeness :D

Speaking of competition....
MLA elections are about to start. And somehow, this time my name IS on the list. My correct and legible name. Unfortunately I've shifted my residence. Full on canvassing even with SMSs being bombarded to me by a certain "English-loving" political party. Although I had no qualms to vote from my old residence but still I was being persuaded to vote from my new one by a pack of power-hungry wannabe "student union".


Speaking of hungry...
I am. I smell cookies. Gkam out.




(Disclaimer 1: The images in this post are under the sole copyright of their owners and I just google them.
Disclaimer 2: I do not intend to hurt sentiments of supporters or crazed fans of the above mentioned by being sarcastic and rude. The purpose of the post is just to tickle the readers' funny bone)

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Trust me on the Sunscreen

While rummaging through my music collection- among the Floyds, Metallicas, John Mayers, Didos- I've always been procrastinating to sort out the unsorted music that I posses in my laptop. Yeah, the one or two folders named "#Categorize" or "#To_be_sorted" that always meets my eye every time I pick my oft-listened-to Aqualung track (Brighter than Sunshine); and get demoted to my peripheral vision which quickly goes to neglected status.
These folders contain a diversity of music in their genres worth of an Amazon rainforest. The deleting of same songs with different versions (acoustic, orchestra, stage live, this DJ, that DJ mix) with varying megabytes is as heartbreaking as choosing which of my metaphorical/hypothetical kids are dearer to me. I had to oblige, once my trusty 180 Gig D drive started gasping out S.O.S.s constantly in the form of "Low Disk Space".

And so this lovechild of indolence and procrastination (me!) today started sorting out those unsorted and multiple copies of the same song with similar names like "Nirvana-Smell's like teen spirit" and "01 Nirvana" and "Smells lyk teem spipit" or even "Neervana" which found their ways into five various folders labeled "Nirvaana" or "Rock muzzic" or "Rocking songzzz" or even "Guitarwallah(!) Songs".

I don't know how many of you have this O.C.D like I do, but I like to arrange my files or folders into thumbnails-provided they assimilate within my vision without the need to use scrollbars-and then by type, and in alphabetical order. Also, I make it a point to remove any numerals, unless necessary and refrain from using any SMS lingo in my files. Thats the basic. I plan to innovate by sorting them into the year of their release, their album cover as folder picture, adding lyric page, and....O.K. Geek alert!! :D

That not only helps me locate my favorite Carter Burwell symphony orchestra track from Twilight or ACDC track (TNT) but also helps Rover (the Microsoft Search Dog) to fetch my files in a heartbeat. I wish I could give it treats or a nice rub sometimes. Good boy, Rover! :)

Talking of one song; which caught my attention today. I read its name, but, surprisingly I could remember how it sounded like. See, the thing with me is that I can't recognize a song unless its been taped in my head atleast seven times-Yeah! thats my magic number-till which I'm like tone/melody deaf. I pick up a couple of seconds later or till the beats start.This time my audio-sensory part of my brain caught up well.

So about this song, its called "Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)" by Baz Lurhmann and its unusual because its a narration of advice.
I did a bit of "research" to find out who it was written by: aaaaand it turns out that after an erroneous claim circulating in the Internet a couple of years ago that an MIT guy named Kurt Vonnegut addressed it, it was actually written by Mary Theresa Schmich, which was published in the Chicago tribune.
You might have come across it already via forwarded e-mails. Its wonderfully written. Here it is, word to word.


Image Courtesy- Discovery Education


"Wear sunscreen. 
 
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now. 
 
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine. 
 
Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday. 
 
Do one thing every day that scares you. 
 
Sing. 
 
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.*
 
Floss. 
 
Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself. *
 
Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements. 
 
Stretch. 

 
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't. 

 
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone. 

 
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's. 

 
Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. 

 
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room. 

 
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. 

 
Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly. 

 
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. 

They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. 
 
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. 

Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. 
 
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. 


Travel. 
 
Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders. 

 
Respect your elders. 

 
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out. 

 
Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85. 

 
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth. 

 
But trust me on the sunscreen. "



Most points are really reassuring. The ones with the asterisks on the end are my favourites. I never knew sunscreen is that effective. :)
 

Monday, September 28, 2009

Let the Festivities begin....

Hey All!

Firstly, Happy Dusshera/ Vijayadashami to all of you!




Image courtesy geet_kunal


The victory of Lord Rama over Ravana; Victory of Goddess Durga over Mahishasura.

I just got to know what all of the10 heads of Ravana signify:
(1) Kama vasana (Lust),
(2) Krodha (Anger),
(3) Moha (Delusion),
(4) Lobha (Greed),
(5) Mada (Over Pride),
(6) Matsara (Jealousy),
(7) Manas (Mind),
(8) Buddhi (Intellect),
(9) Chitta (will) and
(10) Ahankara (Ego).
Talk about split-personalities! What will I do without you Wiki? :D

So Time to Celebrate! Stuff yourselves with all the fafda and jalebi and cham-cham and rosogulla and sandesh and... and...and......
*mouth waters* (OK. Gkam. Focus now. No drool on the keyboard. Focus!)
*ahem*....you can lay your hands on...


So you see, THIS is my favorite time of the year... So many festivals! So much fun. So much food! Yummy!....I mean....Yipppppppeeeeeeeeeeeee!


Not to mention the shopping sales, parties, weddings, buffet.....(Oh STOP it Already!!)...and brand-new-designer-outfits-no-longer-fit....

Oh boy, I can't wait for Diwali.!!! :) :) :)
Halloween! (OK, I don't celebrate it, but I like the idea....Trick or Treat anyone?)
And Christmas and then New Year!!


Oh, the year just ended. Yikes.*Gulp*

I gotta lie down. :|

Erm, Enjoy!! :)




P.S. I got issues with "Time Flying" and "Not Studying". Yeah, I'm the love child of Procrastination and Indolence!

P.P.S. I would have posted this earlier yesterday had my internet connection not thrown a fit. Getting too cranky after 18 hours.. Ho-Hum!

Friday, September 11, 2009

Top 20 ways to kill boredom while Shopping

My family and I rarely visit the friendly neighbourhood Supermarket. How much ever the adverts try, they don't entice us into shopping for their products with "Rock bottom prices" or "earth shattering discounts".
Whenever we do its just the habitual, casual first-day-of-the-month-I've-got-my-paycheck-will-"splurge"-Look!-new-offers type of shopping. It isn't walk in the park actually, when we have to go when the rush hour is at its annoying best.
Personally, I ain't a compulsive or impulsive shopper; I like to shop at my leisure albeit sticking to the list. My family, on the other hand, insists on shopping according to the "routine".


The "routine" is when the four of us are out to shop, it isn't just shopping anymore, but rather turns into more of a military operation. My mom and I would be (wo-)manning the condiments and food-grain aisles and swiftly grab each item as if the Salvation Army needed it for their next mission to Rwanda. My brother and my dad station themselves with a cart each, eyeballing queued up customers for the next empty (or least crowded) spot at the cashier. We keep ourselves updated and communicated on our status with respect to the completion of our target list cum dossier (read:half-a-shopping list) via satellite communication (read:pointing at product and nodding vigorously or yelling at top of our lungs).


That's us. But I feel shopping becomes an "enriching" experience when you have some fun at it, without getting bored. Having said that, I present to you,

The Top 20 Ways to Kill Boredom while Shopping


20. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals.

19. Jump into a shopping cart and try to race your way up to the exit screaming "I'm freeeeeeeeeeeee"



18. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the restrooms.

17. Challenge other customers to a duel as Darth-Vader with tubes of gift wrap.



16. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I believe we have a code 3 in housewares" and see what happens.

15. Convince you've lost your friend and insist that the announcer at the lost and found department announces:  "Thoswana P Badlee, please come to the Lost and Found, immediately!"


14. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.


13. When someone asks if they can help you, you begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people ever leave me alone?"


12. Block a lane with stray shopping carts leading to the Cashier and speak like a sage:
“Say the Magic Word. Only then shall you pass”

11. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.




10. Take up an entire aisle in the Toys department by setting up a full scale battlefield with Pokemon and the Barbies.



9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

8. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible".

7. Switch signs on the Men's and Women's bathrooms.

6. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!"

5. In the Auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.


4. Take 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

3. Dart back and forth from the Cafeteria to the Restroom making retching noises. When have caught somebody's attention say: "It must be the (insert-name-of-food-they-are-eating)"



2. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through say "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

and the numero uno:

1. Go into the Changing Room and yell real loud...."Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"




P.S.: Sniped some points from an e-mail. For more click here

P.P.S. The blog and Gkam neither sponsors or advises its readers to implement/suggest/ameliorate on the above "enriching" activities nor takes the blame/guilt on the lawsuit filed against you by your friendly neighborhood supermarket.
In short: At your own risk... :P

Friday, September 4, 2009

Sweet Agony


She looked at the ceiling and closed her eyes. It was the only comfort she sought.
She couldn’t take it anymore.

She grabbed the bedspread harder and tugged it. She had to stop it, but how?


She couldn’t. Not yet. It wasn’t time.
She would know when it was time.


But the pain…the agonizing pain...


She then saw his handsome sweaty face. He held her hand.
She let him.


He leaned to kiss her.
She turned her face away.


She didn’t know what to think.
Pain tortured her body. But his face brought back memories.
Sweet memories; didn’t alleviate her from suffering.

She had to be strong. No matter what.

He had given her this pain. Of the sweet agony with him that made her suffer.
Why now? She wondered.

He held her hand tighter.

Sweat beads shone over her forehead glistening in the light.

She bit her lip and turned to face him again. He was smiling. The same smile that made her fall in love with him all again.

Her body contorted with every ache. Numbness set in.

She had enough. It was time.

She let go with all the force she could muster. Her lip bled.

And then it was all over.




A sound she was longing for filled the room. It was melodious as ever. She could feel her body again.

“Here you go Mrs. Smith, It’s a boy!” said the doctor.

She held her baby in her arms and cried. She was a mother now. And nothing- not even the excruciating pain- mattered now. It was all worth it.

She looked lovingly at her bundle of joy. Her own blood, flesh and bone. Their eyes met.


He smiled. Just like his father did.





(PS: My first time in such a mode of writing. Need honest advice/suggestions/brickbats/rotten andaa-tamatar in comments section please :D )

Thursday, August 13, 2009

India: not so FAQ

With the schools and colleges closed and most paranoid Mumbaikars confined to their influenzaless homes- unless they brave outdoors only with a green phantom mask-I was bored and browsing through my e-mails when I came across this hilarious one I received ages ago. I ROFLed all over again! :D

The answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have an excellent sense of humour.


Q: Does it ever get windy in India? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Delhi to Goa- can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand kms, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in India? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in India? Can you send me a list of them in Delhi, Chennai, Calcutta and Bangalore? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in India? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. In-di-a is that big triangle in the middle of the Pacific & Indian Ocean which does not.. oh forget it. ...... Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Goa. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in India? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into India? ( UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Indiana Pacers matches schedule? (France)
A: Indiana is a state in the Unites States of...oh forget it. Sure, the Indiana Pacers matches are played every Tuesday night in Goa, straight after the hippo races.

Q: Can I wear high heels in India? ( UK )
A: You're a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Bangalore, and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in India who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Indian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: Do you have perfume in India? ( France)
A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in India? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in India? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

Q: Can I see Taj Mahal anytime? (Italy)
A: As long as you are not blind, you can see it anytime.

Q: Do you have Toilet paper? (USA)
A: No, we use sand paper. (we have different grades)


Happy Independence Weekend y'all!



(PS: Trying really REALLY hard to get outta "writer's block")
(PPS: Thanks to Rach for the e-mail :) )

Sunday, July 19, 2009

You know you are in Engineering....

My four years at engineering took alot of hard work(puh-leez!), dedication(yeah! right!! *rolls eyes*) and commitment (AHAHAHA!).
So here goes the routine.-> Enjoy!

SUBMISSIONS/EXAMS/VIVAS/PROJECTS

1. The local xerox-wallah and Google search engine become your life savers at the last moment study routine
2. When you become a call centre executive on the eve of a major exam, answering to hassled and traumatized peers
3. When you turn into a CIA agent hunting for every note(s) visible and Xerox them all, only to end up with 5 sets of the same notes!
4. Where phrases like “dimag ka short ho gaya yaar!”, “jherroxx kar lena”, “abbey, “proxy maara kya?”, “chalta hai na”, “kuch nahi pada yaaaaarrrrr”, “array, JHOL ho gaya yaar!” are the lingo generated especially during the Preparatory leave (PL)
5. When you confess on your “haaalat” of too-much-portion-too-little-time to your confidante when you’ve already revised the syllabus ;)
6. When you work more on your final semester project than any other assignment in your 4 years of engineering

TRUSTED NUTRITIONIST:

7. Where your local SST hangout is the anna’s canteen or tapri outside college
8. Where cries of “baaatermelaaaaannnnnnnn jooooooozzzz” “vhegg cheeeeeeeejjjjjjjj tosttt” are alluring to your ears and fulfill your daily dietary requirements
9. When opening of 'dabba' at 8.05 am is having breakfast and is natural even when the first lecture/practical of the day is going on amidst professors.

ADVANCE BOOKING:

10. Where your CR is the most dependable person; who can even convince your professor to cancel/ postpone his/her lecture for weeks to come

LABORATORY MANIPULATORY

11. When night-outs in college labs are not just….er…. for completing project work ;)
12. When you realize the importance of hidden files and folders in Windows and root directory in Linux :D
13.When you rather stay up all night discussing “tactics” for the Java practical than studying for it
14.When you complete your journals whenever and wherever feasible as if your life depends on it
15. When you have backup of backup of backup plan(s) even when SOME moron gets a CD written of answers during final exam dry lab practicals
16. When the Alt+F4 combination saves you from getting your ass whipped when playing Slayers and Mob Wars on FB :P
17. When you know the college network administrator’s password better than you know your own e-mail’s
18. When you value MS Word's auto-save feature when completing an assignment /project due next day and power-cuts have no mercy

DANCE OF ATTENDANCE

19. Where even the students who have left the college clear the attendance cut-off percentage even before you do
20. When you spend more hours on traveling to college than on attending lectures
21. When you attend college ONLY to either pay fees/ attendance defaulter’s fine or get notes or claim your hall ticket

PUNCTURING PUNCTUALITY

22. When coming to college at 8.30am for an 8.00am lecture is “thoda late” but 8.35am is “kitna late yaaaaarrrrr!!!”

23. When you frantically chat up a “new admission” in the corridor, only to realize that they’ve been in your class for the past four semesters :O

GTalk + Facebook

24. When you are “busy” on GTalk/Facebook, doing nothing
25. When you are “Not at my desk” on GTalk, you are playing games on facebook
26. Your idea of 'multi-tasking' is chatting simultaneously in multiple GTalk/Facebook chat windows

LIBRARY? (What’s THAT?)

27. When you hunt for e-books and print them rather than stepping inside the library to issue the same for free
28. When “Research” to you is limited to the first 10 hits of Google search to your query
29. When you consider the Handwritten notes of professors as the Bible while research papers are sedatives in paper form.
30. The only time you step inside the library is to get Xeroxes from the xerox-wallah
31. Even if you manage to get further than the Xerox-wallah inside the depths of the library, (G-E-E-K!)you meet the librarian who acts no less than a prison guard guarding the pile of books
32. To ask the librarian to lend u a reference copy (OK, my life depends on that book now!) is equivalent to engaging in mortal combat with her, and you DEFINITELY get KO-ed!





I would like to dedicate this post ESPECIALLY to my wonderful BBI batch of 2009 pals:
Especially,
Amu (woman, you’ve been there through my mood swings, frantic notes collection, et. Al. Thank you for being there for me all these four years!)
•My project gang… the four of us, who ALWAYS stuck as a team: Vidzy, Kanni and Monts.
Vicco (Just chatting away at late nights; anything under the sun and transmitting loads of *ahem* information :P)
Shaily, my sweet friend and support who’s always been a dear friend throughout the 4 years.
Last but never the least,
Raniji who was the life saver of our class, on whom each and every BBI-ite depended on him for something or the other, and never failing on patience. Cheers man! And you \m/

Also like to give a call out to Dhruti, Sangya, Mahak, Shiny, Anindita, Saumya, Sindhu, Sneha, Rucha, Anish, Shibboo, Nutty, Anks, Manni, Shruti, Sunil who've helped me in one way or the other.

Glad i am done with engineering!
Peace out! :D

Monday, July 13, 2009

Fantastic Four


Curdrice aka KarSub has tagged moi.
Without further adieu, I shall torture entertain thee!

Four places that I have lived in


Mumbai, Navi Mumbai (Its different from the former, Mind Ittt!), Indore, Bangalore

Four TV Shows I love to watch

House M.D. :...."Theme Music.".. from Teardrop by Massive Attack
The Little Lulu Show: "...always in and outta trouble, but mostly always in!..."
F.R.I.E.N.D.S :"....i'll be there for you oooooooooo...."
How I Met Your Mother: "..dhan dhan dhan...pa papa pa pa pa..."

Four places I have been on vacation


Goa: Is like my second home
Singapore: Although been there once, would love to visit again
Japan: Moshi moshi! Hajimemashite. Doozo yoroshiku.
My couch: I [heart] my couch, sweet slumber!

Four favorite food items

Missal pav: Give it to me anytime of the day, I'll ravish it!
Coriander Chutney Sandwich: Made by my mum ONLY!
Phanna Dalithoy(Tadka Dal): All u konkanis out there will get what I mean.... :D
Chicken Biryani: Lucky's Bandra wallah :P

(I'm salivating already....)

Four Websites I visit daily


Uno, Dos, Tres, Cuatro

Four places I’d rather be

Harvard University, USA
Fine dining with Brad Pitt (after unceremoniously kicking Angelina Jolie out), George Clooney and Richard Gere
Inside Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory
In a daily comic

Four things I hope to do before I die

Fly a helicopter over the Australian coast
Ride a Double-Decker bus
Eat ice cream at the Antarctic
Meet a person who's name starts with a !

Four novels I wish I was reading for the first time

Calvin and Hobbes Comics
Rage of Angels
Harry Potter series
Yes Minister

Four movies I can watch over and over again

Liar Liar: Jim-Carey-is-the-BEST!
Home Alone 1: Love it!
Beauty & The Beast: Disney's finest...
An Officer and A Gentleman: utterly romantic

Four people I want to tag

(cracking knuckles)


And behind Door number One
Door number Two
Door number Three
Door number Four




(mirthful laughter) :D

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Rhythm Divine


When the skies appear sullen as if after a white-wash, the sun peeps through the clouds no more, the cool icy breeze wavering the leaves on trees, pitter-patter of the raindrops against the windows...What can get better than this atmosphere, when the clouds pour down without inhibition albeit intimidating Nature to take on its course.

All one can do in this wonderful serene weather is to sit back and enjoy nature's spectacle; every cycle begins with the blessing of monsoon as mother earth quenches her thirst for many a months in the seasonal cycle.

The onset of the monsoon brings one joy-one becomes a kid again-and undiluted calmness. I reminisce, the flowing of paper boats across the overflowing water stream, wearing gumboots and flopping about in my raincoat, without a care in the world dancing away to the divine rhythm of the rain. (And also of how being scolded for turning into a muddy mess and have earthworms crawling all over the floors of my home :P)

Of corn cobs being roasted merrily while tea simmers away in an old pot. Of sitting beside a loved one chatting away interrupted only to sip hot tea and eat hot onion fritters. When one doesn't mind when umbrella is forgotten "by mistake" and get drenched to the toe on such a whim.

Such wonderful times, mesmerizing...

Reminds me a wonderful song by B. J. Thomas:

"..The blues they send to meet me won't defeat me
It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me..

..Raindrops keep fallin' on my head..
"

Enjoy the monsoons folks! :)



Statutory Warning: This post may dampen/ unable to rekindle spirits of those afflicted with leaky-nose syndrome (aka common cold).

image courtesy: mlissa2121 from photobucket.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Oh so gorgeous!

Amongst the uncountable number of quizzes, is one such quiz on Facebook called the 'What's Wrong With You?" quiz.
The quizzes i am *ahem* requested to take have vague and simbly stoopid :P results.
But, this one took the cake!

Check it out:

Gauri took the What's Wrong With You? quiz.
Gauri took the What's Wrong With You? quiz and the result is Too Attractive.
Your extreme level of hotness is distracting and offensive to everyone.

(That's not it.... read ahead...)


Seriously. You're so hot that it makes your friends vomit out of jealousy and strangers drool out of animal lust. Invest in some burlap sacks before everyone you know turns into drooling, vomity messes. Or maybe just invest in some mops.

And don't forget to thank your mom and dad for making you so gorgeous. They did good.




Thanks mom and dad! :P

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Ohhhh S**T!

Its been a long looooooong time away from blogging...

Back again!
Refreshed. Revitalized.

Anyhoo, the other day was like any other ordinary day.
Did my ever-torturous project work, came back home, had junk food, left the tap open and slept....








Next morning,
I woke up late.


Big mistake!
No, no wait.... HUMUNGOUS mistake!!!





Oh and did I mention, I live alone.




:(

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Snooze Fest

Sunday! The Lord blessed us with this day! 7th day of the week.
*wipes tear*

Phew! Ive been soooo tired.... TIRED??? an understate-word.. I suppose.

Stupid engineering project.
I don't think I've been so tired since... *lost in thoughts*
.
.
.
.
*still thinking*
.
.
.
*yawns* *stretches* *realizes there is no space to sleep on her laptop amongst the crumbs and dust*

Actually I haven't worked this alarmingly much even in my 4-years of undergraduate education. :P

Need..... sleep.... now....good 12-hour sleep :)


Hence, my trusty 'ol cell-phone/door-bell/alarm/microwave/whatever-rings is undergoing hibernation for the weekend.


Cheerio folks!

P.S. :I HATE you Monday!!!!! :(

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Please Don’t Stop the Music



No other sensible stuff to post, so here goes a game I shamelessly stole from my BB JoJo. Keep posting (stealing) such stuff and more, gal! :D



How it works:

1. Put your MP3 player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the [next] button to get your answer.
3. Write each song name down.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY", YOU SAY...?
She’s Always a Woman to Me - Billy Joel

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Brighter Than Sunshine – Aqualung (*Kisses MP3 Player*)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY?
Let Make A Night to Remember – Bryan Adams (Ohhhkay, If the guy IS Bryan Adams!)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Home – Chris Daughtry (phhhhbbbttt!)

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Crash and Burn – Savage Garden (Cool!)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
White Flag – Dido (Whaaaat? They giving up on me??)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
This Love – Maroon 5

WHAT IS 2+2?
Truly Madly Deeply – Savage Garden

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Umbrella – Rihanna (LOL! :D)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Words – Bee Gees

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Yellow -- Coldplay (:X)

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
The Beautiful People – Marilyn Manson (Yeaaahhhhh!!!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Disco Lies -- Moby

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
My Immortal -- Evanescence (Swweeeeeett!)

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Into the Night -- Chad Kroeger (Nickelback) feat. Santana (Naaaiiiiiiiice!)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Carnival of Rust -- Poets of the Fall (Hmmm)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Sleep – Poets of the Fall (HAHA awesomely true!!!! :P )

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Under the Bridge – Red Hot Chili Peppers

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Rehab – Rihanna (Hey, I didn’t make this up! LOL)

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Kiss From a Rose – Seal (:P)

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Touch My Body – Mariah Carey (:O :O :O)

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
1973 – James Blunt

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
All Summer Long – Kid Rock

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
She Is – The Fray (Huh? SHE?)

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
All the Words -- Kutless

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
American Pie – Don McLean (or maybe I like it… same difference!)

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Apologise – One Republic

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Tear Drop -- Massive Attack

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Please Don’t Stop the Music – Rihanna (Soopah! :) )


I would wish to pass this game on to:
Rach
Mahak
Prash

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Karnataka Trip 2009

As my cousin noted on FB, this year, Ive been India-trotting :P alot. In a span of 3 months I've been to 6 different places, one of them twice.

Cool. I enjoy traveling.
I feel there is more excitement in the journey than in the destination.
Life is all about that. (ahhh, me getting all philosophical!) :P

So here are some of the photographs from the tour to my native state- Karnataka, India.


Murudeshwar beach overlooking the temple.














The humongous idol of Lord Shiva.

















The Majestic Murudeshwar Temple.













Beautiful stretch of coconut trees at Shirali.













Stretch of farm lands at Shirali, Karnataka.













Tidal waves at Murudeshwar beach.













Age lines of a Mango Tree at Mulki.













Green and luscious fern leaf at Udupi.













Violet flowers at Udupi garden.













Hibiscus or Rosa sinensis, also known as Shoe flower at garden in Udupi.

















Flying seed in my palm.

Customer Service? My A$$!

Why the obnoxious title u ask? Well, I am steaming at the moment. Wanna know why? Here's the story:

My Dad and I visited the Vodafone store nearby my place. We had some tinkering to do with my mobile plan. We enter with a atmosphere we Mumbaikars are so used to- an afternoon crowd at the store.
I take my token and I am called at a particular counter within minutes of my arrival. I think to myself, this ain't gonna take long. Good. Or so I think!

A gal in her 20s greets us at her counter; all decked up with her make up and "HAPPY TO HELP" name-tag nicely pinned to her Vodafone t-shirt. Besides her sits a female Trainee, clearly not attentive and stifling a yawn every other minute.

My Dad is seated and I find no chair for me to sit. Been through that before many a times, not a problem standing for a couple of minutes, I think. After we explain our query to her, I feel the need to sit, for which I grab an empty chair from the next counter after asking for it. And the guy who's manning the counter gives me scornful looks as if I was going to steal the chair. OK, that's weird!

Nevertheless, ignoring that OCD counter-guy I ask the 20s something gal to process my request. She does, asking me to fill up and sign few documents, which I oblige. Then asks me for my ID proof. I hand over my Passport. To which she says she needs a photocopy, I nod and let her. She takes it to the photocopier-located 3 counters away and is positioned near a desk full of drawers-and returns with the photocopies and gives me back my passport.
Then she looks at the photocopies and says, my photograph in the copy has come unclear. She asks for my passport again to take fresh copies, which I oblige, again. She returns with the copies and starts explaining some stuff to my dad.

I now ask for my Passport, to which she replies "I gave it back to you naa?!".
I say "No. You didn't" And I promptly empty the contents of my bag searching for it, my dad looks for it on the counter table, underneath the keyboard, the desk... nowhere... ITS GONE!!!

5 minutes pass.

She goes back and check the photocopier. It ain't there.
She goes to the storeroom. Comes back empty handed. (OK, mini heart attack!)
Through all this, the trainee is still seated and not doing anything.

Now, I am FURIOUS!
This time in pure synchronicity, my Dad and I get up and start heading towards the photocopier- It ought to be there.
Disastrous thoughts run through my mind: 'What a fool this female is!'; 'What if someone has stolen it to make fake passports?'; 'What if they have completely LOST my passport!!!'; 'What do I do??'; 'Should I wring her neck first or call the cops?'

No sooner than we get to the copier wearing enraged expressions, than the trainee get up and asks us to be seated. We don't move. Instead we yell at both of them for being so careless. I am fuming.

15 minutes have pass.
The trainee has an expression on her face as if she has hit the jackpot- I see my passport in her hand. (She found it while rummaging through the drawers) I grab it before she offers to me. She didn't do me no favour!

Bigger shocker?
We were expecting some apologies, explanations... and NOTHING! I mean WTF!!!
No morose on their faces. B***h!

To that I reprimanded them for being so careless and irresponsible.
I mean, I was considering legal action had they lost my passport.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

That's not all. I ask for a feedback form, so I could give them a piece of my mind to which they reply:
"We don't have feedback forms, but if you want we can give you a blank form-*pause*-actually its just a blank sheet, where you could write to the concerned department...."
-I just walked off with my dad.

I know what they mean by a "blank sheet". They would it throw in the bin the minute I turn my back or make pinwheels out of it!

Jeez!
Humble request to you all, beware of these Customer Servicers!

Saturday, March 21, 2009

-LOGY

I stole this from my BB JoJo.


1) FOODOLOGY
What is your salad dressing of choice? Southwest Sauce (:heart Subway!)
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? Subway again
Food you could eat for weeks and not get tired of it? Missal Pav :D
What are your pizza toppings of choice? Barbeque chicken, mushrooms, crisp capsicum, jalapenos
What do you like to put on your toast? Orange marmalade or honey


2) TECHNOLOGY
How many television sets are in your house? One
What colour cell phone do you have? black with bronze



3) BIOLOGY
Are you right handed or left handed? Right
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? Nope
What is the last heavy item you lifted? 7.5 kg dumbbell
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? Nope


4) BULLCRAPOLOGY
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? NO thank you! Why would I wanna know?
If you could change your name, what would you change it to? I like my name! Will keep it that way, even after I get married.
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000? Yup, I'm Game. Provided there is a jug full of water later.


5) DUMBOLOGY
How many pairs of flip flops do you own? Two pairs.
Last time you had a run-in with the cops? Never, I usually don't drive.
Last person you talked to: My Mom
Last person you hugged? My Mom :)


6) FAVORITOLOGY
Season? Winter(of Pune, India)
Holiday? Diwali/Deepawali (5-day Indian Festival)
Day of the week? Friday
Month? December


7) CURRENTOLOGY
Missing someone? Yes, very very very much!
What are you listening to? Rehab by Rihanna
Watching? Big Bang Theory, Season 1
Worrying about? Upcoming results!


8) RANDOMOLOGY
First place you went this morning? To the Loo, to relieve myself. (C'mon! Don't ewww)
Do you smile often? Yes (btw, a really sad question!)


9) RANDOM QUESTIONOLOGY
1. Do you always answer your phone? ermmm, depends on who is calling ;)
2. It's four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it? Random Forwards from my University buddies.
3. If you could change your eye color, what would it be? I have Black eyes... so maybe Blue.
4. What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic? Sonic??? I'd like Raspberry
5. Do you own a digital camera? Nope, My mobile camera does most of the work.
6. Have you ever had a pet fish? Yes, they are very much alive and kicking.. all 6 of 'em
7. Favorite Christmas song? Jingle Bells... (*reminisces Kindergarten*)
8. What's on your wish list for your birthday? Currently I need a Battery for my Dell Inspiron 1520 Laptop. Long term wish: A scooty :D
9. Can you do push ups? I can do 10 women push-ups (women push ups are like the regular ones except that you get down on your knees instead of your feet). {Ref. JoJo's Post}
10. Can you do a chin up? HAHAHAHHAHAHaa no ways!
11. Does the future make you more nervous or excited? Excited.
12. Do you have any saved texts? Yes, Many!
13. Ever been in a car wreck? Nope! (*Toucwood!*)
14. Do you have an accent? Yes, an Indian... although its not very prominent.
15. What is the last song to make you cry? Sleep by Poets of the Fall.
16. Plans tonight? Yea, to board a train to head to my native.
17. Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? Nope
18. Name 3 things you bought in the last week? Milk, Bread, Coffee. (That was yesterday)
19. Have you ever been given roses? A Rose.. yes
20. Current worry? It should be 'Worries'. About my ongoing project, and my MBA results!
21. Current hate right now? Going to College every day, but it turns out to be fun in the end.
22. Met someone who changed your life? Yea.
23. What song represents you? Will answer later
24. What were you doing at 12 AM this morning? Chatting away with my pal on Gtalk.
25. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? I need to Pack!
26. What did you dream of last night? Don't remember.
27. What's your biggest fear? Losing my optimism/ self-confidence.
28. How do you feel right now? I feel good. but hungry.

So gotta get that breakfast!

Till then...

Ta!

*Tag is open to anyone who wishes to, and has loads of free time!* :P

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Jigsaw

Click to Mix and Solve

Few random clicks got me to this fun site. Love jigsaw puzzles. Try it out!
My fastest: 3:19
Can you beat my time?

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Weekend in Pune

Over my short over-the-weekend trip to Pune I spotted some pretty flowers and had a few clicks. My (amateurish) hand at photography. Do check them out. Edit after Prashant suggested to classify the flowers.





The picturesque Sunset







Lone Pink flower set aglow









Pink Oleander (Nerium oleander) flower from the oleander family.







The red flower perhaps the wild Ruby Cinquefoil from the rose family.
The tiny Yellow flowers are from the dog flower family and are called Asiatic Witchweed






White flowers (Still not sure of the name)





Edit 1:
Nomenclature courtesy: Flowers of India

PS: Came across a lot of interesting names of flowers; for instance:
Kiss Me Quick
Honesty
Shaving Brush tree (incidentally the flower does look like a shaving brush!)
Thickhead (not kidding)
Lipstick Tree
Hooker's Woodrose
Farewell to Spring
Autograph Tree
Bladder Dock
Cup Saucer Plant
Devil's Backbone
Foolproof Plant
Badminton Ball Tree
Devil Tree
Bridal Veil ..... and a flower on my name!!!

PPS: Hydrangeas are absolutely breathtaking!

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Not the BEST of bus rides

I hate (read:H-A-T-E) traveling by bus. Period. Thank God for trains! Now I usually don't rant and whine, (S and Vintage would be synonymously shaking their heads in disapproval) but this post would say otherwise. I think reading Zee has kinda rubbed off on me :P :D And oh she's a interesting blogger I tell ya.
It was one of those days again where things didn't go as well as planned. Morning I get up as early as 8 and set out to battle against the outdoors when out of my abode's comfort. :P
Anyway as any other Mumbaikar I was to catch a bus to reach the train station within a half an hour's time. The bus came surprisingly on time and was pretty speedy. Or so I thought. The bus got moderately crowded. I scrambled inside the bus and hovered like a hawk to spot an empty seat. For two good reasons:
One: I was carrying my oh-so-heavy-it-would-break-my-limb laptop in one arm and my shoulder bag in the other. (You see, I realized my ONLY mistake after purchasing my laptop for a bargain price was NOT buying a backpack carry case for it instead of the free-of-cost-over-the-shoulder carry case)
Two: I like to sit! :P

To my dismay the reserved ladies' seats were occupied. And so after a while or so of standing and balancing my luggage like a clown on a tri-cycle I manage somehow to acquire a seat. And one with a window view! :D I was contended on that note. And so the passenger man excused himself to let me be seated, with some difficulty. These BEST buses usually have a sequence of two-seaters parallel to each other in every bus.
And I sat, and to my misery or just goddarn luck I realized that I was sitting on the seat which is over the wheel of the bus. So I am sitting in this crouched (read: very uncomfortable) position which on seeing my yoga instructor would've been so proud of me. And to add insult to injury I had my not-so-light laptop and carry bag placed precariously over my legs. And so went five minutes. I thought to myself, 'OK, this ain't that bad, I just have to sit this^ way for another 10 minutes. I'm cool'. And, being proud of myself on being so optimistic and adjusting I sat. 10 minutes. And I sat some more. 15 minutes. 25 minutes.
Right, now my male co-passenger was really uncourteous, not even throwing a look at my misery. He could've at least shifted, he had no luggage whatsoever. So even as I sighed and huffed and puffed, all he was bothered is to watch the bloody adverts on the mini-telly in the bus. and those adverts were so *beep*. The same irritating advert on Chyavanprash being played back to back. 30 minutes down and I was trying to feel my numb butt, adjusting my posture every other minute.
31 minutes down, my ray of hope arrives-the uncourteous idiot get up and leaves, but the bus is so crowded that no sooner did i try to shift, did another guy sit. Aaaaarrrrrgggghhhhhhh! I yelled in my head; grinding my teeth, I sunk further as it was now a whole 45 minutes all thanks to the unending traffic and Metro Construction work. And then finally came a bus-stop where most people get off (bless them) and I could finally feel my legs again! 50 minutes of patience and composure. And I knew I had to blog about it ;)

BTW Mumbai locals ROCKKK!!! Mostly on time :D

^Rotate the image to the left and you'll get to know what EXACTLY I mean.
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